Queki's Journey

I realise that I have been getting rather slack with my life... Not really active in job-seeking, avoiding certain issues with God. Thank God He has not let me go. He has provided me with a good job at Great Eastern. I start work this Saturday & I am really thankful for His providence. Yet there is so much more to be done. the biggest things I have to do now are: 1) Be a good witness for Jesus in my family 2) Do my best at my new job.

Starting next Monday, these 2 things will consume my life. It is now that I remember how Uncle Kee Hong had repeatedly tried to drill the spiritual discipline of reading God's Word into me everyday... Funny how these things come to mind when one realised he is going to move on to the next step of life. I guess good advice is just that way, if it bothers me it just especially bothers me at times like this. Admittedly, I have neglected this spiritual discipline. I satisfy myself with listening to online sermons & reading online stuff about christianity. Still, none of them can replace God's Word. Starting tomorrow, I will begin my day by reading by God's Word again. This time I will read & I will ask God to help me to remember His Word throughout my day. Doing this also helps me to capture my thoughts & focus on Christ, thus keeping me from sinning in the morning.

Another thing that needs remedy is my prayer life. I have been praying to God daily, but these sessions have not been sincere & are usually punctuated with long pauses with my mind wandering off, only to come back to God & finish the prayer hastily so that I can fall asleep in "peace". Yes, you read correctly. Fall asleep. Meaning that I pray in bed just before I sleep... I know that this should not be the case, especially since now I have so much more to pray for. I have decided that from now on, apart from the church prayer meeting every tuesday evening, I will set aside time at least once a week to pray to God. I realise that my posture when I pray is very important too. I usually pray either lying on my bed or sitting on my bed with my pillow on my back. This posture makes it very easy for Satan to come along & tempt my mind with enticing worldly thoughts before I can even properly on God. I will try to pray in a different posture from now on, even if it makes me uncomfortable, because when I'm focused on God, the discomfort disappears.

So, this is how I currently feel... I'm looking at a pretty hectic working life now, so I'm going to enjoy myself as much as I can for the rest of the days I'm free. However, that's not to say that I won't help out at home whenever possible. Oh dear Lord, help me to desire you more. Please saturate my whole being with Your Presence & Your Holy Spirit. Help me to be the best witness for you possible. Thank you so much for giving me this job even though I have been lazy about it. Help me not to be lazy anymore & do my best for You. I love You & I want you to be my God, my Friend, my King. Please save my family too, let them see that You are the great God of the universe!! AMEN.

I have just taken one of the biggest steps of faith in my life. I have stood up for Christ (with God's strength) & professed faith for Him to my mother. She is UPSET. She will not drop her stance of making me worship idols, & of course now that I have made this stand for God, I will no sooner die than worship other "gods". Tomorrow is Vesak Day. She will insist that I worship the buddha statue in my house, so this could be the start of a really testing time for me.

We need the prayer of my siblings in Christ more than ever now, both me & my mum. This is a desperate appeal to those who know Jesus to pray for us. I believe I have never faced darker times at home... Could she stop me from going to church? Possible. Could she stop me from contacting my christian friends? Possible. But I thank God that He is testing me thus, because the bible says that testing of produces perseverence, which produces faith. If I have to be persecuted by my own family, so be it.